[Cecily] Twenty-Five: "Strategic Withdrawl"







       After Fletcher left, I made a rather rude gesture at the door as it closed behind him. Yes, it was childish.
       It's the pain. Really.
       While I'm glad he's around to rein in my more impetuous tendencies, it doesn't help me feel like I have a chance in hell of doing this job right without constant supervision. Nor is it comforting that he thinks I'm the only one capable of pulling it off.
       It makes me feel trapped.
       This is where having a sense of decency and honor gets you screwed.

       I have to admit I can see the avlidity of Fletcher's concerns, but damn, it felt good to get out there and hurt something. I felt better after an hour of wreaking havoc than I have since I've arrived.
       That doesn't say anything very good about me, does it?
       But as I pointed out, my enthusiasm was my downfall. I'm not going to be much good at anything except sitting on my ass for a while with this leg. Maybe I should put it to good use. There's a library here, and it has to have some useful information on military tactics and the like. If not, Luke's gotta have a line on a large historical library somewhere. Depsite our victory today, we still need all the help we can get. I know enough to realize that while we hit them harder than they expected, it was only a fishing expedition, to see what we were capable of.
       Next time we won't be so lucky.
       What we realy need in intelligence. This crazy priate king and his Chaos sword is not your run-of-the-mill villian.
       Maybe it's time to send some eyes and ears into the Golden Circle. This guy's got to have a story.
       I had covered about six pages of a notebook with scribbled plans, lists and needs when Harry came back in.
       "Here, drink this."
       It says some thing for my distraction that I did so without even bothering to question the contents of the cup he gave me.
       It was strong - I'd only written two more lines before things started to get sort of fuzzy around the edges.
       It took me a moment before the significance of that was clear. Then: "You drugged me!"
       Harry took the pen and notebook out of my hands, practically glaring at me. "You need to rest."
       "But..."
       No buts." He bchecked the dressing on my leg, and I was suddenly glad of whatever had been in the cup. Gentle as he was, my stomach turned and the room spun a bit as he probed the wound.
       "Ow." It still burned, but it had been fading very slowly since Merlin and Fletcher had done their thing. At least it no longer felt like my entire body was about to spontaneously combust. Just my left side.
       "See? Now will you listen to me?"
       "Okay," I said meekly. I think my capitulation worried him even more though.
       "Sleep, silly." He brushed the hair away from my face and kissed my forehead, just like he used to do when I was twelve. "It will all still be here tomorrow."
       Maybe that's what I'm afraid of...
       
       

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01/09/01